Recently I had a conversation with someone about crying, specifically crying during the musical portion of the Sunday morning service. We were discussing how this can be embarrassing, and how we as individuals are sometimes unable to control our emotions.
I will start by saying that up until a recent heart change I rarely ever cried. Maybe at a good movie (I shed tears every time I watch the ending of Rudy, as the crowd is chanting "Rudy, Rudy, Rudy"). But many guys will admit to that being an emotional moment. Have you watched the movie Taking Chance with Kevin Bacon? My floodgates were open and active all throughout the movie.
Lately, though, I have trouble with certain worship songs. When we as a body sing "I Will Rise" by Chris Tomlin, I often find myself crying, and at times not just crying, but sobbing. There's this video out there to a song that means alot to me too. It's for the song "Everything" by the group Lifehouse. In this particular video, it's the dramatic display of what the song is talking about that gets me. Watch it here before you read any further - I can wait.
Did you feel anything at the 4:34 mark, where the character representing Jesus moves in to shield the young lady from all that is not Godly? What about at 4:53 - where this same actor representing God throws down all the evil influences in her life? I rarely ever make it through this particular video without some tears being shed.
But these tears - it's not based on emotions alone. I've been in church services where the music, lighting, and special effects are designed to "create" an emotional response. But not at the Journey Church - that's not our desire. We strive for authenticity - in our personal relationships, as well as in how we relate to our Saviour.
My tears only come from a thankfulness to God for all He has done for me - a sinner so unworthy. That He still cares for me after all this time still amazes me. That He never leaves me, but is constantly protecting me from all that is evil, including myself. And not that He cares for me, but one day I will rise up with Him. His Word speaks to me each day about all that He has done, and is doing, on my behalf. Just today I read Luke 7:13 where the heart of Jesus was overwhelmed with compassion for a widow who had lost her only son. Overwhelmed with compassion? After all we have done to Him? Wow!
No more tears? At the least not here on earth, Ozzie. I am not ashamed of my tears, because of the meaning behind each and every last one that falls across my cheeks.